total eclipse of the heart
by sparklylulz
Summary: He held out his hand, whether it was a gesture of friendship or something more, she didn't know, but she found she didn't care either. -St. Berry


**This is my submission for Fuck Yeah St Berry's tumblr fanfiction contest. The rules were to pick a moment from season two with Rachel and add Jesse, and I liked that challenge and that's how we ended up with this. (Also, my best friend gave me the idea for why Jesse is at the hospital).**

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_**'total eclipse of the heart'**_

**rachel/jesse**

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Rachel Berry was having a bad week, anyone who had ever heard her speak could tell that by simply looking at her. Her normally bubbly and overly talkative nature had been dimmed somewhat by the struggle in glee club over God.

Of all the things she thought they would cover, God had never even crossed her mind, now it seemed sort of obvious that they would go down this road at some point. However, she felt that out of everyone in her beloved club, she could relate to Kurt the most. Growing up with two dads in the Jewish community had attracted a lot of negative response. Her daddies had always told her their strength came through God, and she took that life lesson seriously.

When she had approached Kurt about having him speak to her daddies he had simply asked if she shopped at Target and stated that Strawberry Shortcake had called and asked for her wardrobe back, which Rachel found petty and deflective. However, she wasn't going to let Kurt push his father away from the being that might be able to help him- God.

When Mr. Schuester had come and told them that weren't allowed to sing their songs about faith she had been devastated, and rightfully so, because any time a Barbra Streisand number was stolen from her it was painful. Yet, as she had sat under the stars with Finn, who kept trying to sneak his hand up her skirt, the thought had come to her. Burt Hummel was involved with her boyfriend's mother so it was her priority to help him.

She honestly hadn't meant to upset Kurt when she went to sing to Burt, but of course, her plan had backfired. Her plans always seemed to backfire, sure enough, as soon as she saw Kurt's face, tears leaking out of his eyes, she felt guilty. He was such a lost little boy in that second, and she knew how much it hurt to feel that way. She had felt that way months ago when an egg had been broken on her face by the one person she had given her everything to.

Mercedes and Quinn decided to leave after that, seeing how Kurt had unceremoniously tossed them from the room. Finn and his mom were heading to the cafeteria to wait for Kurt to cool down and Rachel decided that they needed family time more than they needed her, so she kissed Finn's warm cheek and turned in the direction of the parking garage.

It was then that her heart stopped beating for a full five seconds. Many things raced through her head all at once; what was he doing here? Why was he so close to her? But most importantly: why was her pulse racing and her heart aching at the sight of him? Then she realized he could see her just as plainly as she could see him.

She turned right back around and walked out of the ICU and into the main part of the hospital, looking for an escape, a reason to not have to look at him or speak to him ever again. It had been over three months, so why on earth was this happening now? Was it karma for praying over Kurt's dad when he told them not to?

"Rachel, you know I have longer legs than you." She froze, midway between the lobby and gift shop, because that wonderfully intoxicating voice was filling her ears once again. She couldn't bring herself to turn around, certain she would start crying if she did.

His footsteps her getting closer to her and soon she could literally feel the star power wafting off of him. "Rachel, stop being immature, turn around." He sighed and she felt anger roar up inside of her and she whipped around, just as he knew she would. He had baited her into it, which she realized half a second too late when she was staring at his face for the first time in so long.

His curly hair was shorter, but his smirk was still firmly in place. As she looked at him so many things seemed to flash through her mind, the very foolish of things. A red swing; the sound of his voice on a warm night; a pink elephant that sat in her closet; all these things that reminded her of Jesse St. James and all the ways that he changed her and all the ways she had loved him.

"Jesse, I have nothing left to say to you, so I would suggest-" She began, but in true Jesse fashion he cut her off in order to make her stop talking so much.

"Rachel, we have a lot left to clear out. We didn't part on good terms." He said simply, leading her out the doors of the hospital and into the brilliant sunshine filling the parking lot where she could see his Range Rover.

"That was your fault if my memory serves me, which you should know I have an immaculate ability for remembering things." She spat back at him, but incredulously, he was smiling a little bit back at her as he watched her rant.

"Still the same old Rachel, I see." He laughed a little, but she glared back at him with enough venom to stop his heart.

"No, I am not _the same old Rachel_, I am a completely different person because of you." She seethed at him, willing herself not to cry in front of him, not again. "I gave _everything _to you, everything. And you... used me for my mother." She said, and this time she really did start crying out of pure anger.

He opened his mouth to speak and she shook her head, because this was _her _time. "I can't believe you would throw eggs at me, after we spent all that time talking about animal rights. Then you had the _audacity _to tell me you loved me. Last time I checked, Jesse, loving someone meant respecting them when you end things." She said, her tears muffling half the words pouring out of her mouth. She could see the concern on his face and it just made her cry harder.

He walked forward to her, arms open and she didn't have the strength to fight him off because what would be the point? Her tears splashed onto his shoulder and she could feel her nose running. She was emotionally drained after the week she was having.

"You were supposed to love me forever, we were supposed to conquer Broadway and have kids with perfect hair and amazing talent." She spoke, finally voicing what had hurt her the very most. " I could have loved you forever." She sobbed and he hugged her closer, finally finding a moment to speak.

"I wish I could love you forever, Rachel. I will always love you, always. When we meet on Broadway with our talent, you'll remember that." He said gently into her hair, "Don't do anything rash, because you may regret it." He spoke with kindness holding her closer.

"What are you even doing here? Stalking me?" She asked, lifting her head off his chest, trying not to attach herself to him. He laughed then, and she realized how much she had missed his laughter, she smiled in response because his Jesse smile was contagious.

"My uncle is in the ER for a broken wrist." He said simply, "And it's fall break at UCLA." She understood in that moment that any feelings she had for him would be in vain because he lived in California.

"Oh, well I'm sure school is going well for you." She said awkwardly, wiping her eyes and feeling idiotic. Surprisingly, she didn't feel angry at him anymore, she had finally expressed everything she wanted to say to him. Mostly she felt so tired that she didn't even want to stand anymore.

"Not really, I mean I like the music department, but California isn't as great as I thought it'd be. It's sort of lonely." He said and she heard a taint of sadness take his tone. "I'm actually thinking of transferring to Tisch School of the Arts, I like New York more than California anyways." He looked around for a moment, and Rachel saw the small flickerings of nervousness. She could hear a line repeated in low tones from a night months ago, "_You make me nervous, Rachel. I like that._"

"That's where I'd like to go." She offered softly and he smiled at her.

"I know." He said simply, causing her to wonder why he chose Tisch. She looked at him, her heart fluttering a little. She looks back over her shoulder to the hospital, thinking that Finn would be busy for a while and wouldn't need her for anything anytime soon before making up her mind.

"You wanna go get something to eat? I know a great vegan place, because hospital food isn't really suited to our necessary diets as stars." She asked gently, and he smiled at her then. He nods softly and motions towards his car.

"My uncle left a few minutes ago, so I'm up for anything." He held out his hand, whether it was a gesture of friendship or something more, she didn't know, but she found she didn't care either. She outstretched her fingers to touch his and they walked across the parking lot in the gleaming sun.

When they met for the first time again over two years later in college, they couldn't help but fall in love with each other again.


End file.
